Who is talking to me in my sleep?

What are your first thoughts when you wake up in the morning?

Most days, I feel angry. I must admit, there’s absolutely no reason for my anger. I don’t even know what I’m angry about. But I start my day every morning with a rush of negative thoughts. Then, it settles down with my first cup of chai.

I can let great amounts of time pass by without any recollection of what I have been thinking about. Is it an ‘artist’ thing? I came across an article that suggests the subconscious mind of an artist is constantly generating ideas, even when they’re not actively working on a piece of art (It should be true for civilians also but I like to make everything about ‘the artist’). Anyhow, I eagerly await a call, email, or letter from that part of my brain to reveal its thoughts and ideas.

It is a typical Gurgaon winter morning today. (The Oscar for the Best Segue in a Blog Post goes to Anshu Mor!) I have a tall glass of cold coffee on my table. My morning ritual. My MacBook beckons me to write while printed pages of a standup set are screaming to be edited. The jokes are not good enough yet.

The phone, casually placed next to the laptop, exudes an attitude of royalty - “I can get you whenever I want”. The screen lights up, demanding my attention, but I know better. You’re just a tease, Buddy.

Next to the coffee glass, is the wrapper of paper straw, spoiling the aesthetics of the set-up. It’s purpose shrouded in mystery, probably a mere reminder of hygiene.

A Korean is seated a few tables away from me. Since I’m a big fan of Korean series, I’d love to strike up a conversation with him. However, it seems that Koreans in real life don’t have subtitles, which is quite disappointing.

The coffee shop I frequent has revamped its morning playlist, and it’s fantastic!

I should dig deep into work right at this moment. It doesn’t get better than this. I should be grateful. I am.

Every night, before I sleep, I think of this exact moment and I feel happy. I get to do this. It’s perfect.

Then I wake up angry!

Who is talking to me in my sleep?

Is darkness more optimistic than light?

Love & hugs,

A